Are you a chronic over-communicator? You may be unknowingly sabotaging your relationship. Join the Sexy Confidence Club: In this video, I'm going to be talking about three times in a relationship where you may want to actually take a step back and pull back from communicating what it is your thinking or what it is you're feeling.
3 Toxic Ways You Might Be Over-Communicating in Your Relationship #1:
Number one is over-texting. One pattern I've been noticing in the Sexy Confidence club forum is this discussion about texting. A lot of the members and a lot of the women who are posting in there are talking about how they don't feel like they're getting enough responses from a guy that they're dating. This is a new pattern. I'm noticing that women who are in even the first month or even the first two or three months. They have this expectation that they are going to hear from their guy, once, twice, three, four, five times a day.
Even ten years ago, there was a different set of expectations when it came to texting and communication in a relationship. I believe this is just a result of society expecting that we get everything that we want when it is we want it. I blame Amazon for this. But it's true. We feel like if we want to talk to someone just because we have their phone number and we have this little device right here, then we have a right to talk to them. I know for a fact that even five years ago when Jessica and I met, we weren't texting four or five times a day. If she said within the first three months of us dating that I'm not texting her enough throughout the day, I would have to rethink things. Because that, to me, communicates that that person needs to get a life.
3 Toxic Ways You Might Be Over-Communicating in Your Relationship #2
The second way people overcommunicate in relationships is over-communicating every single emotion that flows through your body. Now I, for one, am a total over-communicator, and I've had to pull this back as well, which is, choosing your battles. For example, Jess and I are currently planning a wedding, and it is a pretty big and complex wedding. If I had personally communicated everything I felt through every single step of the way, she might murder me.
Over the past few years, I've become more aware of my emotions as they creep up. Try to think, "Are they even logical? "Is this something I want?" If I'm feeling a certain way. If I'm frustrated and I want change, and I don't want Jessica to do something, is that logical, or is it just some random emotion that I'm feeling because I'm hungry or tired or whatever? So for all of you, when you do, you get frustrated or angry, or something is really bothering you, really take a little bit of time for that to settle in. Don't just immediately jump to texting or immediately communicating with your partner what the problem is. Give it a little time to breathe. Because in some cases, that emotion that you're feeling isn't even logical in the first place.
3 Toxic Ways You Might Be Over-Communicating in Your Relationship #3:
The final way a lot of people overcommunicate in relationships. This is for a lot of you sexy single ladies who are working on your confidence in relationships is apologizing too much in a relationship. When we are in conflict with someone in a relationship, it can be really easy to apologize for something to kind of put that bandaid on it and be able to move on. That is very important at times to be able to assess when you're wrong and then, of course, apologize when you feel that you are wrong. However, if you're the type of person who is continuously apologizing even if you did nothing wrong whatsoever in the relationship. To keep things copacetic, then I want you to take a hard look at that behavior because that in itself is over-communicating.
I want to hear from all of you, have you ever over-communicated in a relationship, and how did it work out? Leave a comment right there below. Also, if you enjoyed this video, please give it a like on YouTube. Don't forget to subscribe on YouTube. Also, I have a course in the Sexy Confidence club that is available to all members. It's called "Rich Relationships." It walks you through the four components of a healthy relationship:
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